Last May I wrote a blog stating my frustrations with dating and what men do that annoy the crap out of me. Well friends, it has been eight months and I have decided that it’s time for some new guidelines… new suggestions, if you will.
1.) In the first post, I mentioned something about texting. My friends, I am going to mention this again. PICK UP THE PHONE AND DIAL THE NUMBER! Please? Every once in awhile? Us ladies love the sound of a nice manly voice. I will agree, sometimes texting is much more convenient and I am in love with it. However, isn’t it much easier to plan something when you can both have a chance to state your opinion verbally? Instead of waiting on a text message to come through that will tell you whether you are smoking crack for wanting to see that movie or not? So choose wisely when you are sending that text message. Ask yourself: Am I making plans? Am I wanting to have a very long conversation about how both of our days went? Does her cell phone plan limit her text messages per month? If you answer ‘yes’ to those questions, DO NOT START TYPING. Just pick up the phone and call her. I guarantee she will appreciate that much more, unless she is 15. And if you are above the age of 18, that is pretty illegal. Good luck not getting caught by her parents.
You ARE allowed to text her for the following reasons:
- You both went out on a date and you want to make sure she knows you had a fantastic time.
- It’s the middle of the day and you just want to say hi real quick, even though you know she is at work. She thinks things like that are cute and sweet.
- She texts you because she is excited about something (like the fact that the restaurant she is at wraps leftovers in a swan made out of foil). You can text her back and be excited with her.
- You are with other people and you want to tell her something but you don’t want the others hearing. That’s cute as well.
2.) Men think they know what they want. And you know what?? They do! Men know what they want! And when they want it bad enough, they chase after it. However, most men cannot put into words what they want. The other day I asked a friend what he wanted in a girl and this was the conversation we had:
Him: “I want three things. They have to be pretty, love sex, and love movies”.
Me: “What if she is dumber than dirt but she has those other three ‘qualities’, if that’s what you want to call them?”
Him: “That won’t happen. I don’t date girls who aren’t intelligent.”
Me: “Well then they have to be smart for you to date them! That’s FOUR things. You need to analyze this a little better.
See what I mean? It’s all so cut and dry to most of them. They know what they want enough to not date someone who has no brains, but they don’t know how to say “She has to be intelligent in order for her to be dating material”.
Women on the other hand? We know what we want too. But the way we explain it is very complicated. Just because we explain it in a complicated way however, does not mean it has to be hard to understand. This is what we want (by we I mean that this is an example of what I want… which is pretty much universal): Confident but not cocky. Good hair. Good shoes. Funny but not lame. Nice but not so nice that people walk all over him. Independent but doesn’t have the ”it’s my way or the highway’ attitude. Can take care of himself but will let me step in and do something nice every once in awhile. Basically, what we want is someone who has good shoes, good hair, and has a happy medium of good and bad attributes. How hard is that? NOT HARD AT ALL. Right?
So this is the thing. Since everyone somehow seems to not understand each other, how about we fix that by being honest and actually talking(not texting) about it? Ladies, when you want something and it seems like your man has NO IDEA what you are expecting, just tell him as plain as day what you want. He’s not going to read your mind. And also remember, if you are dating someone and you see yourself putting in much more effort than he is, it might be a sign that he doesn’t like you enough to put forth the energy to keep you around. Don’t get me wrong. He might like you. But he doesn’t like you. Not enough. Not as much as you probably deserve.
3. Do not buy concert tickets as a Christmas gift. A few years ago I had a really good friend buy the girl he was dating two tickets to a Snow Patrol concert. And you know what she got him? Two tickets to the exact same Snow Patrol concert. I made fun of them and laughed at them because I thought it was ridiculous. But you know what? This past Christmas karma got the best of me. I bought tickets for someone who already had tickets to the show. Moral: Don’t make fun of people.
Wow, the things I could say in rebuttal to this.. I will let your mind wonder since you like what you like, but you have some good points.. But I disagree a bit too.
I think a big part of some womens’ issues with not getting “what they want,” is they don’t pay attention. Just pay some attention to other things once in a while and not watch the dude’s shoes!
Oh and this stuff, it would only work in an idealistic world. However, there is no perfect scenario and not a single person is like the other. I am set in my ways and typically it is my way or the highway, with a tad of room for opinions.. but mostly not. I don’t seek the approval of my ways from women and that is something I will search for in one (not having to approve of what I do..)
But then again, blah blah blah bersha bersha bersha is all I read. Where did this jazz come from? Sorry I already had the tickets, but ROGER will still buy them!!! haha
Oh, I guess I need to be more specific… Qualities I cannot stand in a girl:
When she cannot seem to make plans or decide anything. Indecisiveness is completely annoying, just say, “lets go see a freaking movie,” and tell me WHAT, WHEN, WHERE for the movie and lets see what happens.
I cannot stand the chase chase chase shit. If you call me, I don’t answer.. don’t call back multiple times hoping to get me to pick up. I am not answering for a reason, so therefore I likely will continue to not answer and texting me will just make me more frustrated.
Pay attention to what I am saying, and remember what you say.. nine times out of ten, I will remember what you say. (that goes for everyone.)
Have some self-esteem and strength to yourself, otherwise I am going to not want to be around you; I need someone at least on par with my experience, knowledge, emotions, etc. If you are more emotional then I can handle, I likely won’t talk to you.
Since we are talking about women who are nuts… If you are nuts! Just tell me, I would much rather take you to the doc and get you some pills knowing you are trying to be not-so-nuts, then listen to you complain about how you are not crazy and stop calling you crazy (Amanda ignore this, I know you are crazy already..)
Don’t give me everything at once, I will ask when I want to know
I like to leave voicemails from time to time.
I do not like it when you just say uhh huh, yes, no, etc… be intelligent and let’s use our big girl words!
Yeah that is a lot I am sure, I have loads more.
Haha, you’re right Justin. I AM crazy. CRAZY COOL! You make me laugh.
Wow the whole thing just sounds bat shit crazy to me! LOL! While I don’t bother looking (because really who has the time?) I just can’t seem to find anyone as equally interesting as myself.
I mean seriously – where else are you going to find someone who’s imagination is so big that they think of crazy sour patch kid costumes, has conversations with her dog that are more interesting than 90% of the conversations she has with actual people, and who thinks there’s nothing greater than living alone and walking around in your knickers all day?
When it comes to my life I say if it ain’t broken, don’t try and fix it. Maybe down the road someone will strike my fancy, but until then me and The Kid are perfectly content watching our BFF Martha on weekdays interruption free! Bwhahahaha
In my opinion, people are like jigsaw puzzle pieces, either they fit or they don’t. Everyone wants certain things in a partner, but in the end it all comes down to whether two people are truely compatable and work well together. Checks and balances baby! What I’m lacking in, he excels in or vice versa. Then there are also equal parts. We both love, think, believe, want, know,…. the same thing (i.e. getting the same gift for each other). My point I guess is that we all might make a list, but in the end you might actually find that you were meant to be with the guy with the “ugly” shoes.